[Kakyoin gestures to Abbacchio just lying there as if to say, what kind of idiot do you think I am, look what you've done. Polnareff. My guy.
He sits down and reaches to take Abbacchio's hand, since who knows, maybe he has Death By Touch Disease and everyone who tries will make it worse. Baby steps. It feels perfectly normal to him, soooo.
[When Kakyoin takes his hand, he almost feels immediately better. He lets out a relieved sigh, squeezing Kakyoin's hand. Sorry bud, but he needs this.]
[So fuck you too? He flips him off, but, like, in a slightly worried way. Like, he's irritating, but also concerned. There's a lot going on right now.]
Seriously, you should go to a doctor or something.
[Is he just here to hold hands? Yes. Is he going to pick sides? Also yes. You fucked up, big guy. He shifts, to uhhh, put his other hand... on Abbacchio's forehead? You know, like you'd do for someone who's sick in a normal way. He's trying.]
[Polnareff also in return receives possibly the laziest middle finger that's ever happened. His free hand does not even lift from the bed anymore since it flopped down after pointing, he's just flipping you off from the mattress.
The hand on his forehead is okay. It does something. Still infinitely better than being drained like a battery.]
Yeah? I should go to a cuddle doctor? That what you're saying?
[Abbacchio appropriately grumbles now instead of tired mumbling at least.]
Seriously. Something is wrong with you. That's never happened before with anyone else.
[Admittedly, this is probably his fault. But on the other hand, fuck you both? He scowls back at them, but, like, there's only so long he can argue a losing position.]
Maybe it's the combo. The two of us, y'know? Or--
Hey, c'mere when you're done with him.
[Because now it's experiment time, and he's holding out his hand for Kakyoin, just to see if it works. Or, no, this is taking too long: he just puts his palm flat against the back of his neck, that'll definitely not backfire in any way.]
[Hey, what the fuck?? He's lucky Kakyoin has no arms free to elbow him in the throat, because that's his instinct. The Chroma coming from his hands on Abbacchio is there, he can feel it, he knows what that is - so Polnareff slapping impotently at his neck (more or less) feels off immediately.
He ducks his head, trying to lean away from that nasty hand.]
[So it is him, then. He is patient zero. Is this how plague victims feel? Probably. With unfeeling loved ones and a society built upon the very thing he cannot give, how tragic, how awful, no one has suffered as he has suffered.
Or, possibly, it'll wear off in like two days just like every other cycle around here. At least he takes his hands back and keeps them to himself.]
So now what, I never touch anybody until all the squids are dead or whatever?
[Slowly, Abbacchio starts to sit up. It feels like there's more to replenish than how quickly Polnareff drained him. Then again, there was like, holding and kissing involved, so. Yeah, he's going to need to sort out some more moonlacing after this.]
[Just stand in the corner and slowly evaporate, Polnareff, that's how it's done.
Kakyoin does not say anything, because he is not the dying man here, but he does hold up three fingers, as if to award Polnareff three Asshole Points. Rated and reviewed.]
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He sits down and reaches to take Abbacchio's hand, since who knows, maybe he has Death By Touch Disease and everyone who tries will make it worse. Baby steps. It feels perfectly normal to him, soooo.
Three... two...] Anything?
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Yeah. That's better.
[Tiredly, he points at Polnareff.] Fuck you, man.
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[So fuck you too? He flips him off, but, like, in a slightly worried way. Like, he's irritating, but also concerned. There's a lot going on right now.]
Seriously, you should go to a doctor or something.
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[Is he just here to hold hands? Yes. Is he going to pick sides? Also yes. You fucked up, big guy. He shifts, to uhhh, put his other hand... on Abbacchio's forehead? You know, like you'd do for someone who's sick in a normal way. He's trying.]
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The hand on his forehead is okay. It does something. Still infinitely better than being drained like a battery.]
Yeah? I should go to a cuddle doctor? That what you're saying?
[Abbacchio appropriately grumbles now instead of tired mumbling at least.]
Seriously. Something is wrong with you. That's never happened before with anyone else.
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Maybe it's the combo. The two of us, y'know? Or--
Hey, c'mere when you're done with him.
[Because now it's experiment time, and he's holding out his hand for Kakyoin, just to see if it works. Or, no, this is taking too long: he just puts his palm flat against the back of his neck, that'll definitely not backfire in any way.]
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He ducks his head, trying to lean away from that nasty hand.]
Are you serious? Stop it.
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[So it is him, then. He is patient zero. Is this how plague victims feel? Probably. With unfeeling loved ones and a society built upon the very thing he cannot give, how tragic, how awful, no one has suffered as he has suffered.
Or, possibly, it'll wear off in like two days just like every other cycle around here. At least he takes his hands back and keeps them to himself.]
So now what, I never touch anybody until all the squids are dead or whatever?
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Unless you want to be an asshole, yes, that sounds right.
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[Slowly, Abbacchio starts to sit up. It feels like there's more to replenish than how quickly Polnareff drained him. Then again, there was like, holding and kissing involved, so. Yeah, he's going to need to sort out some more moonlacing after this.]
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You still feel like you're dying?
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Kakyoin does not say anything, because he is not the dying man here, but he does hold up three fingers, as if to award Polnareff three Asshole Points. Rated and reviewed.]
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[THREE ASSHOLE POINTS, way to go man]
I'm sure I can find someone to make up the rest of it. But you should probably figure out what the fuck is wrong with you, Polnareff.