Okay so there's this drug store in Cosenza and I bought this bright yellow lipstick from there (don't worry it was a phase and I am over it) and after I used it I found this actual fucking human hair in it. After I used it! On my mouth!
And then I took it back and the manager said she wouldn't give me a refund because I'd used it already and that the hair was probably mine. Even though it was a long fucking hair - like longer than yours? - and I had this adorable pixie cut at the time?
And that was like. 12 euros I'm never fucking getting back. And also a human hair! On my human mouth! So I'm going to ruin that manager.
Just probably not by shoving her inventory down my tits.
Edited (dear me: please decide on a gender for this random npc and stick to it) 2020-07-02 13:15 (UTC)
ok you gotta start by putting a strand of hair in some of the products and i mean like whatever's in a box that is easy to miss initially but it cant be yours so this will get weird
I mean that part's easy enough I can just like. Take some hair from Mista. He won't mind. And like he wears a hat all the time so nobody even knows he has hair so nobody's going to suspect him.
Okay so I got the hair - hypothetically I didn't just steal some hair from Mista like right now - and I just put it in some of the stuff. Then what? I put up a review of the place like 'ew, there's a hair in my stuff, did anyone else find a hair in the stuff from here'?
make multiple online accounts discuss the hair problem see other people get involved hopefully witness the manager panicking and trying to defend herself
Thanks for this, by the way. If I don't do stupid shit like this at the start of each month I end up wanting to like. Tear people's arms off and then shove them bloody end first up whichever of their bodily orifices is most convenient. Or make anonymous posts about being fucked up. And the former is apparently looked down upon by polite society and the latter is kind of embarrassing so.
nah i super get it i used to have an outlet but now im just trying to not burn shit down or kick someone's ass or something so i'm all about revenge fantasies hell yeah
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no subject
step back
revenge on who
no subject
And then I took it back and the manager said she wouldn't give me a refund because I'd used it already and that the hair was probably mine. Even though it was a long fucking hair - like longer than yours? - and I had this adorable pixie cut at the time?
And that was like. 12 euros I'm never fucking getting back. And also a human hair! On my human mouth! So I'm going to ruin that manager.
Just probably not by shoving her inventory down my tits.
no subject
like super fucked up
we need a better revenge plan
fuck this manager
ok
you gotta start by putting a strand of hair in some of the products
and i mean like whatever's in a box that is easy to miss initially
but it cant be yours so this will get weird
no subject
Okay so I got the hair - hypothetically I didn't just steal some hair from Mista like right now - and I just put it in some of the stuff. Then what? I put up a review of the place like 'ew, there's a hair in my stuff, did anyone else find a hair in the stuff from here'?
no subject
discuss the hair problem
see other people get involved
hopefully witness the manager panicking and trying to defend herself
no subject
Thanks for this, by the way. If I don't do stupid shit like this at the start of each month I end up wanting to like. Tear people's arms off and then shove them bloody end first up whichever of their bodily orifices is most convenient. Or make anonymous posts about being fucked up. And the former is apparently looked down upon by polite society and the latter is kind of embarrassing so.
Revenge fantasies it is.
no subject
i used to have an outlet but now im just trying to not burn shit down or kick someone's ass or something
so i'm all about revenge fantasies hell yeah